Welcome back to The Nick Broadhurst Show. I’m your host, Nick Broadhurst, and that song you were listening to is a song called The One, which you can hear the full song at iamnickbroadhurst.com/theone and in this episode’s show notes at iamnickbroadhurst.com/31. I will link to the music video as well, which is just absolutely beautiful. It’s one which I wrote about my wife.
I tell you what, it’s so relevant today, “You’re such a shiny mirror. You force me to surrender.” Well, today’s episode is about something which is very very current. It’s actually something I’m experiencing right now in this moment, something which I am battling with and want to share with you because I do believe there is always a lesson, there is always goals.
And I chose The One because it’s a reminder to me of how important it is to treat the person that you love the way that they deserve, and a reminder that just because someone is a shiny mirror doesn’t give you an excuse to reflect back all your crap onto them, which is what I have been doing.
Some days you just don’t want to show up. Some days, you don’t really want to face yourself, or perhaps face the consequences of your actions, and today is one of those days for me. Usually, I jump out of bed to do my podcast episode, and I usually have it done by 8:00 am. It’s now 3:40 pm. I’ve been putting it off all day, and that’s because I just haven’t felt particularly comfortable in my skin today.
Why is that? Well, I was not a very nice human yesterday to Melissa, to my wife, and I was on day 17 of my 21 day negativity detox. It’s the furthest I’ve ever made it. You can learn all about the 21-day negativity detox in my episode number three, iamnickbroadhurst.com/3. I would love it if you joined me, and tell me how you’re going on social media because man, I’m struggling. It’s not easy.
Now, I find myself back on zero because I think speaking rudely to someone else is certainly a negative, but I’ve been pondering what to talk about today, and I’ve been struggling with the resistance of actually just sitting down and doing this episode. I found so many other things to do today.
I went on an extra long walk. I mean. it was beautiful, from Bondi to Bronte and back, along the oceanfront, and to some degree, I needed that time out just to rebalance. I’ve been watching the winter Olympics. 18 more through than I probably need to, all in an attempt to just not show up.
But as I was walking, I thought, when I get back, I just have to show up. I’ve got to do this episode. So of course, this episode is about showing up, and there’s been a particular, I guess you could call it issue, which has come up for Melissa and I for a few years now, and it’s one which we have just found it harder to move through and I found myself definitely playing the blame game, pointing the finger and not taking responsibility for my own actions and my own part in the co-creation of this issue.
And so that resulted in a very late night discussion, a lack of sleep and a pretty grumpy household this morning. But ultimately, what I have to do in this moment is I need to show up. I need to keep moving things forward, and I do that, first and foremost, by sitting down with this microphone and getting on with the work of being of service.
And secondly, I have to show up for Melissa. And how do we do that? It’s really really simple. In fact, it’s really so stupidly simply that I always kick myself when I forget and find myself in this situation and then remember when it’s too late. The answer is very simple. When you’re in a relationship, the easiest way to show up is just to be love, to give love.
If you want more love in your relationship, if you want more peace, if you want more ease, more grace, more affection, more passion, more inspiration, more play, more fun, more adventure, then you need to be all of those things yourself. But sometimes, it’s just hard to be in your own skin, and today is one of those days for me.
So the best I can do right now in this moment is to be love, just to be love. That’s my promise to myself today. That’s how I’m going to show up for Melissa when she comes home. I will do my very best to be love, because that’s what we’re here to do.
And remember, we teach what we most need to learn. Why do you think my logo is a giant red heart? Because this is something that I personally struggle with, every day. I can become quite heartless, so while I can live from the heart a lot of the time, and I can be very warm a lot of the time, my challenge is that my polarity is being heartless, being cold, being harsh.
We all have our own unique challenges, but when we show up each day in our own way, we move forward. We move beyond, hopefully, one day, some of these things. And there are things which I used to struggle with, which I just don’t struggle with anymore. I have moved beyond them because I kept showing up.
This episode is so important to me because just sitting here is lifting me out of my funk. It’s a self or co-created funk, but sitting around watching the Olympics eating lots of food and taking extra long walks is probably not going to move me forward. Being of service, on the other hand, will move me forward. Being love on the other hand, will move me forward.
So, I want to pose a very very simple question for you today. And that is, how can you show up today? What is there that you can do that can move you forward? Is there something which you know deep down you have co-created or created but have not taken responsibility for, and have pointed the finger and blamed someone else for?
We’ve all done it. But if there is something right now in your life which is bothering you, which is causing you stress, which is upsetting you, should we not look to see what part we have played in that process?
And I now, thanks to my extra long walk can see my part very clearly because even though sometimes it might look like someone else is really creating an issue out of nothing, if you look really deeply, or sometimes not even that deeply, but in this case, I’ve had to look deeply to see where I am co-creating this particular issue.
So I’d just like to encourage you today to look, to really look at that situation which is causing you stress, which is making you upset and just look at it because what you resist persists, and what you look at disappears. I’ll say that again. What you resist persists, what you look at disappears.
If you consider the laws of attraction, I believe the very famous Secret movie which was directed by a very dear friend of mine, Drew Heriot, when you look at that, I believe it was very misunderstood. And, my perception of the law of attraction is this; you repel what you want and you attract what you fear. You repel what you want, and you attract what you fear. Just think about that.
So, today’s episode is really about looking at those things that you have been resisting. It’s one of the best ways that you can show up for yourself, is to stop resisting, because when you resist, it will persist. When you look at it, it will disappear. It’s like a light that comes on in a dark room. As soon as that light comes on, as soon as that focus of energy is in that dark room, it is no longer dark. That is the power of looking at what you are resisting. It disappears.
So my lesson today has been to never forget that we are always co-creating. We are always playing a role, and there is always a lesson, and this one particular thing I have resisting has been certainly persisting, that’s for sure. But I’m not going to do that anymore. I’m going to bring it out into the daylight. I’m going to look at it until it disappears.
Because I do believe I have feared this thing, and therefore, I have attracted it. I have wanted something else in this situation, so I have repelled the very thing I have wanted because I have not wanted that thing from the right place. I have wanted that thing from a position of suppression or repression.
So what can you look at today? That’s how we can show up for ourselves today, is to just look, to see. And remember, today is a beautiful day. Look up. Look within. Most importantly, be love. Be love to others. Be love to yourself. Be love to everything. Be kind. Be gentle. And what you resist persists, and what you look at disappears. Have a beautiful day. I love you heaps.
I would love to hear from you, so please tag me @IAmNickBroadhurst on social media, and use the hashtag #TheNickBroadhurstShow, or leave me a comment below (I read every single one!). And if you could take a minute to leave me a 5 star review on iTunes I would be very grateful.