Sex As An Act Of Service

Episode Resources

Today’s episode is episode number six of The Nick Broadhurst Show, and before I get into that, I want to mention an update on my Negativity Detox, the 21 Day Negativity Detox. Now, if you’re watching on Instagram Live or Facebook, you’ll see that I’m wearing my wristband on my right arm, which means I got to number two, and then yesterday I failed miserably. In fact, I made a comment about the way someone looked, which wasn’t very nice, so I’m back to zero, dammit.

Anyway, it’s really challenging, and just remember, you start on zero, so the first day you do it you start on zero, and so I’d made it from zero to one to two, and then got reset back to zero. So, I’ll keep you posted on that, and if you are doing the 21 Negativity Detox, please let me know on social media, you can use the hashtag 21 Day Negativity Detox and tag me at Broadhurst World, and if you missed that episode, you can go to

But I have a frickin great episode for you today. Today’s episode is called Sex as an Act of Service. This is an interesting one and it’s very personal and a touch explicit, so if you have the kiddies around, feel free to mute, but I’m really excited to talk about this. For me, it’s a really crucial topic to discuss. It’s something which has completely changed my life, and I think for me it goes all the way back to when I was a child, when I was a boy.

I think men, as boys, we grow up and we keep things secret. We don’t talk about sex, we don’t talk about masturbation with our families; we certainly do in my house now, with Leo, we definitely talk about it. But that was not my experience, so it was something that was always a bit naughty and a bit secret. I think like most boys, I developed an unhealthy obsession with masturbation and there’s nothing wrong with masturbation, it’s all good, but I think when it’s done in secret and it’s done in extreme, it’s not a healthy thing.

The secrecy I believe trains boys to grow up and become men who believe that it’s mainly about them. It’s about them getting their rocks off when they make love, when they have sex. And so I’m going to give you a bit of my story, so you can see how it’s evolved for me.

My story, going back, let’s go back to my first marriage. In my first marriage, I had absolutely, seriously absolutely no idea what I was doing, honestly, no idea. I was still very much a boy. It was still very much about me. I didn’t know what it meant to serve the feminine, and I didn’t realize, I didn’t recognize that for that entire relationship, the feminine was just craving attention from the masculine.

But my masculine was very — it wasn’t there, it was childish, it was boyish. I didn’t know how to give what the feminine needed, and that really did seep into all areas of our life and really resulted in us having a lot of different problems, and eventually that marriage dissolving and creating a lot of unnecessary pain.

In my next relationship, I never — it was a beautiful relationship, it went for three and a half years, amazing woman, but I had never really transcended that stage yet, I was still — I learnt a lot in life, but I still didn’t understand what it meant to be the masculine, the strong plus the one; and that relationship really was just two people closing their eyes and just doing what had to be done to maintain a romantic relationship. We were just really maintaining our own expectations of each other and that did not lead to any experiences of depth. It was loving but shallow, and again, that relationship ultimately dissolved, and once again, my masculine did not show up and the feminine was not served.

After that relationship, I started thinking, “I’m doing something wrong here, I really need to get my stuff together and start learning about this.” I started studying David Deida’s work, in particular the book The Way of the Superior Man and The Enlightened Sex Manual, and another great book The Multi-Orgasmic Man, and it was seriously like my eyes were opened for the first time. Like a whole new world was opened to me, a whole new world of possibility.

And so in my next relationship, which was shorter, it was five or six months, I got to put this into practice and I started to feel what it was like to show up as a man, to be that strong yet warm masculine. I started to discover my own sexuality, and my masculine energy in that experience was the complete parlor experience to what I’d ever had before, and it was somewhat of a testing ground. It was a very evolutionary relationship for me because I finally got to show up and I felt like a real man, and that testing ground really led me to my next experience, which I’m still in, and that was with Melissa.

Now, Melissa and I have gone to places I never, ever thought possible, and for me, that’s come about because I realized that fulfillment for me in sex came from totally being of service to my queen. Being of service to my queen, so for all the men out there listening, let those words sink in. I don’t need to ejaculate to experience orgasm. For me, the orgasm is in seeing her connect with source. For her it’s a godly experience back to love.

This stuff is so powerful and when you get deeper and deeper into the different types of orgasm that women can have, beyond clitoral, into g-spot, into cervical orgasm, when you go to these depths, you unlock places in the feminine that they didn’t even know existed, and as a man, it makes you feel so incredible because you are in service, and all humans, our purpose is to be of service in life.

Our purpose is to give, and our love making should be no different. And this has taken not only my relationship and my love making to a new place, but it’s taken my life to a whole new place. So women, if you’re listening to this, please do share this with your man, or vice verse, if you’re in a heterosexual relationship.

And for fellows out there, you can take your queen to places that you never dreamt of, that she never dreamt of. This is one of the most powerful things you can do, being in a relationship with your partner, is one of the most powerful opportunities of growth. It’s a sacred container, a bubble, which you can exist in that expedites your evolution, it expedites your growth.

And this is kind of a call to arms for men because this stuff’s not widely known and I really feel like it should be, and perhaps, I hope, I know that Melissa’s book, Open Wide, is going to really make a big difference; that’s largely aimed for the women out there. But for men, definitely check out The Way of the Superior Man, Multi-Orgasmic Man, The Enlightened Sex Man.

There’s lots of great books out there, but this is a call to arms for men to step up and to serve your queen, because I guarantee you, if you take this approach, if you take the approach of serving, being of service to your queen, you’re entire life will change. Your career will grow, your health will grow, your relationships with your children will grow.

And this is also permission for women to receive, to know that it’s okay to just be, just be, be love, to receive; to know that you are worthy of unlocking depths of your soul that you never knew existed, and I guarantee you that in love making, this can happen for you. You can experience God. You go back to source. You become love. That is the power of sex as an act of service.

I hope you enjoyed that and it’s something I’m very passionate about, something to think about, something which can be very challenging for some and some people just know it’s time. I hope that you can embrace what’s been discussed, and by all means, definitely check out Melissa’s book Open Wide, because it is a stunning book and it reveals all of this information to you.

For men out there, I just encourage you to be open to a new experience. If you haven’t experienced sex as an act of service, serving your queen, I encourage you to just be open to that, it’s a beautiful, beautiful thing. So, have a beautiful day. Pounder this. I hope it sparks some curiosity into a very powerful area of your life.

I would love to hear from you, so please tag me @IAmNickBroadhurst on social media, and use the hashtag #TheNickBroadhurstShow, or leave me a comment below ( I read every single one!) Thank you for being here! And as always, listen to your intuition (and maybe your Dr because I have to say that) when implementing any new practice into your life.


    • Inspiring…thanks.

      November 4, 2018
      • Thank YOU for being here :)

        Nick Broadhurst
        November 9, 2018
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