When I Was 8 Years Old

This is Nick in 1986. I dreamed of so many things as a kid, and even at this age I knew exactly why I was here on this planet. Huddled under my bed sheets to muffle the sound, I would sneak a few extra minutes of listening to 1940’s big band music on my cassette player. There was a deep connection with music that I could not explain. It was just me and still is. The course of my life was set and the only choice I had was to follow my dharma or resist.

As a teenager I bathed in the attention I would get from always being the one in the band taking all the solos. It made me feel relevant, like I had a place in the world that was just for me. Perhaps it was because time stood still. There was only presence. But as I got older, doubt started to creep in. Surely I couldn’t make a living playing music? I needed a real career right? So off I went to university to study, of all things, Industrial Chemistry. It didn’t take me long to figure out that sitting in a lab with chemicals was not my life path, so I did what most Australian teenagers do and went travelling around the world.

After 10 months I arrived back in Australia still no clearer on what to do with my life. And then, through a series of divinely organised events, I found myself in a sweaty underground club on a Sunday night in Bondi, sax in hand, back in the spotlight. It had been years since I had played, but my mouth and fingers never forgot. There were one hundred bodies pulsating to the best music I had ever heard. That was the first time that Angus, Daimon, Damien and I all played together, and Sneaky Sound System was born. Seven years later and a number 1 album under our belts, I decided again it was time for a real job. It was at this moment I should have/could have looked at this photo. When I was 8 years old.

When was the moment that I forgot just how amazing I am and what a miracle it was to be me? So many choices I have made over my life have been from fear and forgetting the truth of who I am. But this was my lesson. 30 years after this photo was taken, I am where I am and love who I am. There are no regrets and I can’t change choices made yesterday, but I can choose today. Right now.

There is no other time than now. If not now, when?

I wonder if we all regularly looked at our 8 year old selves, would we choose differently in each moment?

What will you choose today?

What can you create?

When doubt creeps in, ask yourself… what would my 8 year old self do?

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A dear friend and intuitive healer recently asked me for a photo of myself when I was 8 years old. This is Nick in 1986. I dreamed of so many things as a kid, and even at this age I knew exactly why I was here on this planet. But would I always remember just how amazing I am and what a miracle it was to be me? So many choices I have made over my life from were from fear and forgetting the truth of who I am. None of which I regret because I love who I have become. I can’t change those choices but I can choose better right now. There is no other time than now. If not now, when? I wonder if we all regularly looked at our 8 year old selves, would we choose differently in each moment? What will you choose today? What can you create? #mindfulness #presence #loveyourself

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